Chart of the Six Love Styles
The theory of six love styles was developed by John A. Lee in his 1973 book Colours of Love . According to the theory, different individuals approach love relationships in different ways. Lee used the following Greek words to describe the six different styles:
Style: | Based on: | Combination: | Description: | |
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Eros(IR-os) |
Romance | Primary style | This love style is the one most commonly portrayed in Hollywood movies. Also known as "love at first sight", it is based on "chemistry" and a strong physical and/or emotional attraction. |
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Ludos(LOO-dos) |
Conquest | Primary style | This style is used by those who see love as a game and want to "win" as many partners as possible. The focus is on having fun in the moment and therefore relationships of this sort tend to be very short. |
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Storge(STORE-gaye) |
Friendship | Primary style | This style of love grows slowly out of friendship and is based more on similar interests and a commitment to one another rather than on passion. |
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Pragma(PRAG-ma) |
Practicality | Ludos + Storge | This love style is very practical and realistic. People who prefer this style approach their relationship in a "business-like" fashion and look for partners with whom they can share common goals. |
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Mania(MANE-ee-ah) |
Obsession | Eros + Ludos | This style usually flows out of low self esteem and a need to be loved by one's partner. Lovers of this sort usually become very possessive and jealous. |
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Agape(aw-GAW-pay) |
Selflessness | Eros + Storge | In this style of love, the individual is willing to sacrifice anything for their partner. It is based on an unbreakable commitment and an unconditional, selfless love |